Oh my goodness...will this week ever end. I am so tired!! Why do I want this week to be over, it is not like the weekend will be filled with peace and quiet anyway. I have had a pretty rough week emotionally. As a good friend put it...to many open wounds that have not had time to heal. And who suffers for it...hubby!! We have been struggling all week. He doesn't understand why I am so distant from him and no one else. I tried to explain to him that it is easier to pull away from him than the kids. The kids will not understand why mommy doesn't want to play or snuggle and watch a movie. I try really hard to connect with them so that they are not thinking that I don't love them or that I don't want to be with them. Hubby is older and can understand more than they can...or at least that is what I thought. Appartently I was wrong, I had to explain it to him. Now I think that he gets it, I hope. I am hoping that next week will be better for me. I feel like I am on a roller coaster ride that is out of control...
Lord please help me find balance in my life. Help me to seek you, even when it is really hard to concentrate. I need you in my life, holding me, comforting me, loving me!! I pray that you will pick up the pieces of my heart and mend them in a way that only you can. And I pray that one day I will be able to look back and see your hand in all that has gone on. Thank you for loving me when I don't deserve the love. Thank you for saving me so that one day I will not only be reunited with you but also with my parents and my little angel. Guide me, keep me....amen :>
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
There he goes again!!
As an update to my last blog....
Upon leaving work on Monday, I found something very interesting on my car....what could it be?? There goes my honey again....on his lunch hour he went to the store and bought flowers and a card, and left them on my windsheild!!! How sweet??? Yes he had a purpose for doing so, but does that matter?? I think not :> He does get brownie points though!!
Upon leaving work on Monday, I found something very interesting on my car....what could it be?? There goes my honey again....on his lunch hour he went to the store and bought flowers and a card, and left them on my windsheild!!! How sweet??? Yes he had a purpose for doing so, but does that matter?? I think not :> He does get brownie points though!!
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
So, you think your hubby rocks??
I have been reading several blogs lately that claim that their husbands are the best. I have stood back and let you all go on and on about how your hubby is the best and how he deserves an award for his unfailing love and devotion. Well, let me tell you all that MY MAN is in the running!!!
I want you to meet Trey. He is a very simple man, a country boy. (ok Becky...a redneck :>) For 14 1/2 years I have had the pleasure of calling him my husband. When we were dating it was poems, flowers, notes on my car, late night phone calls, songs being dedicated to me and I could go on and on. I have to say that after we were married some of those things were forgotten. But now he is topping all of those wonderful things with more amazing things.
Let me ask you....
will your husband paint your toe nails..even if you are not pregnant?
Does your honey run you bubble baths with candles lit all over the bathroom when you have had a rough day with the kids?
Does he come home after a long day working, and offer to cook so that you can just sit and breathe?
Does he put flowers on the bed to show his love for you?? (this was my birthday a few years ago...sweet!!)
Does he do the laundry on his day off?
Will he scrub the toilets?
Does he do the dishes at 6 am so that you don't have to wake to a dirty kitchen?
Will he go to the mall and spend hours shopping with you?
Would he go get a pedicure with you, if you couldn't find anyone else to go with you?
These are just a few of the amazing things that my honey does to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!!
Okay...
now does your honey admit when he is beat??
And then allows everyone to know about it??
Does he let the moment get captured by a photograph for all to see?? Yes ladies, he is really kissing my feet!
That is just some of the things that he does for me.
Now lets move on to what he does for the kids.... gets the up every morning for school, feeds them, packs their lunches, makes sure they brush their teeth, and then takes them to school...all while I lay sleeping...at least on Tuesdays and Fridays. He plays ball with them, takes them on bike rides, plays games with them, watches movies with them, and will occasionally read to them (not his favorite...you know...he has a Bryan High Education :>) And when it is hunting season he will get the kids up at 5 am and take them to to sit in a deer stand or duck blind for the morning hours (and for those of you who have ever been hunting with little ones...it is not easy) But the most important thing he does for them is showing them the love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!! He reads scriptures with them, helps with memory versus, and guides them to serving the Lord whole heartedly. He is teaching them that serving the Lord does come with sacrifices on our part but with the right heart they are not sacrifices in our eyes...just the eyes of the world. What may be important to others...you know...cell phones, ipods, fancy cars, big expensive house, the clothes that they wear....are not as important as doing what God has instructed you to do. Just him following the Lord in his own life, no matter the cost, is teaching his children that Jesus is number one above all things.
And that is just what he does for his children.....what about all the other children he teaches?? He makes sacrifices for his "other children" as well. Other children??? Well what about he Youth that he teaches. Every Sunday and Wednesday is trying to lead other peoples children to love and know Jesus more. Not to mention all the camps, DNOW's, SNAC's, fun trips, and any other activity that he plans with them. He has taken on a very vital role in our children of tomorrow. He is worried about the leaders they will become with the Lord in their lives. His mission statement is.....giving the youth of today the foundation that they will need to stand strong as the adults of tomorrow!! He take an active role in their lives when their own parents won't.
He does have two other children that he has taken under his wings...his niece and nephew. When his sister died, he decided that they were going to need him more now then just any average uncle. So he takes them and tries to instill in them the values of the Lord as well.
If these things don't qualify my hubby for husband/father of the year....then this world is in some serious trouble.
So you think your hubby rocks....Have you met mine???
I want you to meet Trey. He is a very simple man, a country boy. (ok Becky...a redneck :>) For 14 1/2 years I have had the pleasure of calling him my husband. When we were dating it was poems, flowers, notes on my car, late night phone calls, songs being dedicated to me and I could go on and on. I have to say that after we were married some of those things were forgotten. But now he is topping all of those wonderful things with more amazing things.
Let me ask you....
will your husband paint your toe nails..even if you are not pregnant?
Does your honey run you bubble baths with candles lit all over the bathroom when you have had a rough day with the kids?
Does he come home after a long day working, and offer to cook so that you can just sit and breathe?
Does he put flowers on the bed to show his love for you?? (this was my birthday a few years ago...sweet!!)
Does he do the laundry on his day off?
Will he scrub the toilets?
Does he do the dishes at 6 am so that you don't have to wake to a dirty kitchen?
Will he go to the mall and spend hours shopping with you?
Would he go get a pedicure with you, if you couldn't find anyone else to go with you?
These are just a few of the amazing things that my honey does to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!!
Okay...
now does your honey admit when he is beat??
And then allows everyone to know about it??
Does he let the moment get captured by a photograph for all to see?? Yes ladies, he is really kissing my feet!
That is just some of the things that he does for me.
Now lets move on to what he does for the kids.... gets the up every morning for school, feeds them, packs their lunches, makes sure they brush their teeth, and then takes them to school...all while I lay sleeping...at least on Tuesdays and Fridays. He plays ball with them, takes them on bike rides, plays games with them, watches movies with them, and will occasionally read to them (not his favorite...you know...he has a Bryan High Education :>) And when it is hunting season he will get the kids up at 5 am and take them to to sit in a deer stand or duck blind for the morning hours (and for those of you who have ever been hunting with little ones...it is not easy) But the most important thing he does for them is showing them the love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!! He reads scriptures with them, helps with memory versus, and guides them to serving the Lord whole heartedly. He is teaching them that serving the Lord does come with sacrifices on our part but with the right heart they are not sacrifices in our eyes...just the eyes of the world. What may be important to others...you know...cell phones, ipods, fancy cars, big expensive house, the clothes that they wear....are not as important as doing what God has instructed you to do. Just him following the Lord in his own life, no matter the cost, is teaching his children that Jesus is number one above all things.
And that is just what he does for his children.....what about all the other children he teaches?? He makes sacrifices for his "other children" as well. Other children??? Well what about he Youth that he teaches. Every Sunday and Wednesday is trying to lead other peoples children to love and know Jesus more. Not to mention all the camps, DNOW's, SNAC's, fun trips, and any other activity that he plans with them. He has taken on a very vital role in our children of tomorrow. He is worried about the leaders they will become with the Lord in their lives. His mission statement is.....giving the youth of today the foundation that they will need to stand strong as the adults of tomorrow!! He take an active role in their lives when their own parents won't.
He does have two other children that he has taken under his wings...his niece and nephew. When his sister died, he decided that they were going to need him more now then just any average uncle. So he takes them and tries to instill in them the values of the Lord as well.
If these things don't qualify my hubby for husband/father of the year....then this world is in some serious trouble.
So you think your hubby rocks....Have you met mine???
Sunday, February 10, 2008
What a MAN!!
There is no sound to this video. I remember recording it with my digital camera, I was pregnant with Evelyn at the time. This is so funny...my husband the kid!! That is only one of the many reasons that I love him so much!! ENJOY!!
Look how happy she was!!
I was going through my camera just looking at all the pictures that I had forgotten about and found all the pictures from Christmas. I came across this picture. This is my mother...look how happy she was. My brother asked her what she wanted for Christmas and her reply was "a red toaster". That is what she got. She was so happy and excited over that red toaster!! I just wanted to share a memory that I have of the last few times that I saw my mom.
Has it been 6 months already?
Oh my goodness...my baby is 6 months old!! I took her to the doctor on Thursday for her check up...and oh my...she weighs 21 lbs 12 oz and is 28 1/2 inches long!! She weighs the average size of a 11 month old and is the average length of a 12 month old. So I determined that what he was telling me was that my daughter is not AVERAGE!! I could have told him that...none of my children have ever been average ;)
As an update for "She's on the move"....She has started pulling her knees up under her, stretching, reaching, and trying so very hard to move forward. Mind you, she is not on her hands...her face is buried in the floor and her hands are out stretched in front of her. But she is trying!! Also, she is now rolling around in her crib...Trey put her to bed the other night on her back and when I went to get her the next morning she was on her stomach. Things are going to be changing around here!!
Monday, February 4, 2008
OH the PRESSURE!!
I guess it was going to happen sooner or later, I was just hoping it would be later than sooner!! I am now feeling very icky :< I have so much sinus pressure that I feel like my head is going to explode! Then there is all the drainage...yuck! This Texas weather is to blame...cold...warm...and then warmer and warmer. What is a person to do??? MOVE??? I don't think so. I have been fighting this for a while now and just can't seem to lick it. I stayed home from work today to rest...with a 6 month old in the house??? I have a wonderful baby!! When she woke this morning around 7 am, I decided to go ahead and feed her. She ate and played for a little while, then mommy was ready for a nap. So together we climbed in my bed snuggled, and fell asleep. WooHoo!! I slept off and on, you know how you sleep with a baby in your bed, till 11:30! It was wonderful. She ate lunch and is in her bed resting again until we go and pick up the other two from school. I am feeling so blessed right now. Maybe I will go get some rest too.......
Sunday, February 3, 2008
She's on the MOVE!!
Well, it official....Hannah has become mobile.
I was worried about her not rolling over by 4 months, so I asked the doctor about it. He said there is no "thou shalt roll over by 4 months"...don't worry she will. The nurse said it was going to take a lot of engery to move all that over...have you seen Hannah lately...Well she decided to roll over from back to tummy about 1 week after seeing the doctor...and from tummy to back 2 days later. We really hadn't seen her do it again in a while.
Well this weekend I believe something clicked. It was as if she said "oh yeah, I remember!" And now at almost 6 months she is rolling everywhere. She rolled over and over till she hit the couch and became upset when she couldn't roll any more...she is definitly showing her displeasure with things lately. So, it is time to baby proof :> I will be moving things to a much higher level around here. Just wanted to share my excitement with you all. My baby is growing faster than I can keep up :>
Friday, February 1, 2008
The House is Almost Empty :o(
Well...today after work I went by my moms house just to look around.
Its almost empty.
I feel sick.
I want to scream.
It still smells like her.
My heart is pounding.
I MISS HER!!
Things are in boxes on the floor, wrapped up ready to go.
Everyone has been in and out taking things they wanted. Just a few items remain. Part of me wishes I could have taken it all. I really wanted to just bubble wrap the whole house and move it out here...we have the room...then I could just go over there when I wanted. Not realistic??? I know. Stinks!! I want to call her....I want to hear her voice...I want to feel her hugging me!! Is she really gone? Isn't this just a dream? A nightmare right? I always thought that I would be devasted when my father died...you know, I am such a daddy's girl. But I guess since I watched my father waste away to practically nothing, and suffer such pain that it was a blessing to know that he was in Heaven walking again. But my mom?? No time to prepare...no time to say good-bye. No time to say how much she meant to me...no time to tell her what an inspiration she was to me. NO TIME!! I know that she knew that I love her, I told her that just about everyday. I look back and wish that I had went to see her the Saturday before she died. I wish I had taken the time to drive over there and visit with her....I know she wanted me too, I could hear it in her voice...but I didn't. Oh stupid me!! I am reminded of the song by Garth Brooks...If tomorrow never comes...
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
She must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes
I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel
Tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes
There I go again thinking of songs...musical person remember?? So take heed...read these words...let them speak to you!! Don't let today go by without telling your loved ones how you feel. Don't live with the regret of not saying how much they mean to you. Trust me...I would have never thought that tomorrow would never come.
The house is almost empty and I want to scream.
Its almost empty.
I feel sick.
I want to scream.
It still smells like her.
My heart is pounding.
I MISS HER!!
Things are in boxes on the floor, wrapped up ready to go.
Everyone has been in and out taking things they wanted. Just a few items remain. Part of me wishes I could have taken it all. I really wanted to just bubble wrap the whole house and move it out here...we have the room...then I could just go over there when I wanted. Not realistic??? I know. Stinks!! I want to call her....I want to hear her voice...I want to feel her hugging me!! Is she really gone? Isn't this just a dream? A nightmare right? I always thought that I would be devasted when my father died...you know, I am such a daddy's girl. But I guess since I watched my father waste away to practically nothing, and suffer such pain that it was a blessing to know that he was in Heaven walking again. But my mom?? No time to prepare...no time to say good-bye. No time to say how much she meant to me...no time to tell her what an inspiration she was to me. NO TIME!! I know that she knew that I love her, I told her that just about everyday. I look back and wish that I had went to see her the Saturday before she died. I wish I had taken the time to drive over there and visit with her....I know she wanted me too, I could hear it in her voice...but I didn't. Oh stupid me!! I am reminded of the song by Garth Brooks...If tomorrow never comes...
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
She must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes
I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel
Tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes
There I go again thinking of songs...musical person remember?? So take heed...read these words...let them speak to you!! Don't let today go by without telling your loved ones how you feel. Don't live with the regret of not saying how much they mean to you. Trust me...I would have never thought that tomorrow would never come.
The house is almost empty and I want to scream.
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